Dear Diary,
Today I told another guy that I can't accept his adore and he told me I'm bullshitting. He said why didn't I told him at the first place when he asked me to be his girlfriend. Actually I too think is a bullshit. When he asked me whether I have anyone I'm secretly adore and I asnwer "No" when I'm still "waiting" for Woo Yi Ming to ask me.
I felt so bad for lying to him. I like his company but do not want him to be my companion. I'm so selfish. I have cheated someone's feeling because it just feels good when someone is wooing you. What a selfish jerk I am!!! I'm so sorry. I really wanted to apologies so badly to him. Now I can't bare to see his face even though I can't bare it since we met, but still, now is even worst. Maybe I shall do anything myself from now onwards.
Hoping for someone to help you without giving something to him?? This things will never happens to me. I just have to accept the fact that I'm not easy to go along with and I may be a spinster. Maybe I shall give up on LOVE.. This matter has indeed brought me quite a lot of pain. Should I lose me fate just for these two guys?? Maybe...
I know if I said living alone is not bad after all, is definitely a lie but I have no choice but to convince myself that it is indeed not bad. I'm so down right now. I have no idea what to do right now. Haiz...
Signed Off,
My Voice
